It's an interesting little short, worth keeping around for a little while, I think. However, it's too short to become anything great. On the other hand, it looks like your drawing is good, so I'll need to keep an eye out for you next entry.
Thanks, i just had like, an urge to submit something. :) Thanks.
Well done on your first upload. It may not have been your first movie, but meh.
This seems (to me anyway) to hold all of the creepy...ness of the original movie. It had that kind of heart grabby feeling which I hate. The sounds added to the movie well, and I think you did them just right. Graphics were fine, though the character models could use some improvement, I think, (particularly with the eyes, which to me looked more funny than anything. Then again, they are pretty hard to draw well.
Another thing which lost some marks is lack of originality, as you didn't add much to the original video. You did well on it, but I like to see more added, really.
Other than that, it was a good first effort, and I hope to see more development in the "long version."
thanks for the review and for the rating :D
Let the water run
How rare it is that something like this appears on newgrounds. Some people only come here for sex or blood, so they won't like this. Heed them not.
An pleasure to listen to
This really is an excellent piece of music. It is build around a very simple chord progression, but never gets repetitive because of the changes in tune. The only negative points I can see are pretty minor, and much of it comes down to personal taste. In my opinion, the piano repetition of the B at around 45 seconds is unnecessary. I cannot tell precisely why, but my best guess is that it is too heavy. Stick a diminuendo in, and fade it out, and that should solve the problem. Around 1.15, consider changing string accompaniment, as the modulation is not completed ‘normally’ because of it. I can see the modulation being very successful with a few minor tweaks to the strings at this point, but as it is, the listener is distracted by the clash. The same thing occurs again around 1.35, and again around 1.45, though here the clash is disguised somewhat because of the voice.
Not withstanding these two small points, the music is successful, interesting, and a pleasure to listen to. I’ve given you a 4, but only because it’s not quite perfect. It would be a high 4.
I am quite impressed by your knowledge EvilChuckle, your words are truly helpful and greatly appreciated. I will carefully look over the song, not to resubmit, but to learn these mistakes I have going on.
Thank you for the review.
Good, but should be expanded
What you have is a pretty good accompaniment, in my opinion. I would suggest that you add more of a tune than what is taken by the bass in this extract, for example, on the violin. Think along the lines of the moonlight sonata; nothing complex, but something to add a bit of variety. Also, if you wish to bring the percussion in, give them a longer fill as an introduction, as the "unexpected" entrance doesn't work so well, in my opinion. The ending is a little abrupt, though you could use the chord progression that you have and just add a broken A minor chord with a roll on the ride cymbal.
As I usually say, don't give up on the piece, but develop it and post your results.
Thanks man. Yeah, it is kinda repetitive, I spent only a few hours on it, and whenever it comes to more instruments I mess it up. But I'll try to fix it. Thanks for reviewing anyways. I'll check your stuff out if you have any.
Not too bad, but a few issues
What you've got isn't terrible, but there are several things which you could do to improve it. Firstly, add some structure. A simple Binary or Ternary form (e.g. AB or ABA, probably Ternary would be best) would add a lot to the piece. For example, expand into a slightly 'fuller' B section, with the chords filled out in the right hand, and return to the original idea to close. Another point is to avoid thirds in the bass, as it tends to sound muddy, especially in a quiet piece, and especially when they are used so regularly. Either spread the chord, use 6ths or 10ths instead, or raise them an octave or two. Finally, record and play it yourself, if possible! The music is sapped of emotion by the robotic, perfect playing style. Play rubarto, and add more dynamic variation!
Aside from this, you have the makings of a pretty good piece here. Don't give up on it, but attempt to expand it and make it better, and post your results.
Thanks man, but I ain't really into music theory, although I have plans to learn something this summer. The piano ain't played by the computer, I'm playing it, but on a TYPING keyboard. Tha's right, I don't have a midi keyboard. I'll see what I can do to improve it. Thanks again.
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